Thoughts from my high school self part II

I guess this is sort of self-centered of me. BUT OH WELL.
August 31, 2003: "I asked my mom why gay men tend to get AIDs more often than other people, and god I really didn't think she'd know. She explained stuff I really didn't need to know about anal sex and semen." Comment from Camille: A little while ago I asked my mom that question! It got really complicated and I changed the subject. The same thing happened like a month ago when my mom and I talked about sex changes. From now on, I'm going to avoid all thsoe topics with her.
September 7, 2003: I hope some terrible disaster occurs at Franklin overnight or tomorrow morning that would prevent us from going to school. That would be awesome. [WHOOPS.]
September 9, 2003: Okay, I could really go for some natural disaster targeted at Franklin right now. Flash flood? Fire, perhaps? [WHOOPS AGAIN.]
September 22, 2003: 82 years ago today the Band-Aid was patented. Just thought I'd let y'all know because Band-Aids are awesome.
September 26, 2003: Okay Robert Palmer and George Plimpton died. Geez. What the hell is going on?
September 29, 2003: Three months from today I'll be sixteen. Also, Elia Kazan died.
October 2, 2003: Today is the Radiohead concert and Gandhi's birthday. Cool.
October 22, 2003: So Elliott Smith killed himself. God. Why would he do that?? I can't stop crying!
October 27, 2003: When Chris Anderson read that my essay topic is why gay marriages should be legalized, he said I was disgusting. I told him to fuck himself. I was proud.
November 5, 2003: Last night I watched Rock the Vote, this thing on CNN that had the democratic presidential (sp?) candidates answering questions from younger people. Very informative, that was. Someone asked if any of them had honestly smoked pot. Some said yes (Howard Dean woo!), some said no, and the woman said "I'm not going to answer that,". Pleeeeease. That pissed me off. I don't want her to win.
November 24, 2003: Funerals scare me. A dead body over here, sobbing people over there.
December 6, 2003: my mom and I watched Marathon Man. Hella good movie, but now I'm more scared than I was already of dentists. And of Nazis.
December 23, 2003: I also guessed Tina Turner when Camille goes "MY HUSBAND BEATS ME!" [we were playing the charades part of Cranium)
January 30, 2004: He peer reviewed my essay in English and butchered it. On one of his comments, he wrote "Your essay is wonderful" but then crossed out wonderful and wrote "just ok". What the fuck man, I can still see the wonderful.
February 15, 2004: I'm really tired, but if I go to sleep, I'll wake up and it'll be Sunday, the day before school. And that sucks.
March 13, 2004: We also read Rolling Stone at WRBH. It was so funny, I had to read about Yanni and his album called ETHNICITY (come onnn) and she had to read about R. Kelly and his child pornography and his album named Chocolate Factory and we couldn't get through it without laughing. She really had to edit like six minutes of us just trying to do it and then just laughing our asses off.
April 7, 2004: Not too sure about that geometry quiz. When I turned it in, Mr. Taylor raised his eyebrows at it and I couldn't tell if it was a good eyebrow raise or a bad eyebrow raise.
April 9, 2004: Some woman who identifies herself as "mama" keeps leaving messages on my phone looking for "Sheldon" because his friend "Edward the mechanic" has been looking for him. I should probably answer the phone next time so she knows it's the wrong number. But I don't know, they're kinda funny. She just keeps talking until the message stops her.
April 11, 2004: Early this morning it stormed like crazy. It was sorta cool, but my bed is up against my window and I couldn't sleep, since it was so loud. It started hailing, too. I wish it had flooded Franklin. What a break that would be. [WHOOPS PART III]
April 16, 2004: And then my mom picked me up and we went straight to the theater. Then we saw...KILL BILL VOLUME II. My God. Words cannot describe how fucking amazing it was. Seriously, I can't even talk about it.
April 25, 2004: I couldn't figure out why my ice cream tasted weird, but then I realized it was because I had chewed mint gum not long before. I don't recommend doing that.
May 1, 2004: In English my class exploded into discussion about things such as infinity and zero. It was strange, funny, and annoying. I was talking to Brad after class, and we were the only ones in there, and as we were walking out, Luetz [my 10th grade English teacher] said, "Hey, you two" and we stopped and he said, "There are negative numbers in math, right?" I thought to myself that surely he was not asking some weird obvious question, and that it must have some underlying meaning. Brad and I looked at each other and I said, "Like...negative numbers?" and Luetz said, "Yeah, you know, less than zero?" and Brad said, "Yeah" and Luetz said, "Well, see, try to comprehend that" and I said "Well, we hadn't been arguing about it" and he said, "Oh, I know"
May 5, 2004: Josh described To Kill a Mockingbird as being so good, he wanted to punch someone in the face. And that's how listening to [the recording of the Radiohead concert in New Orleans] makes me feel.
May 8, 2004:I have a headache. But I'm blasting Radiohead through my earphones. "These go to 11".
May 10, 2004: I had to write five lines of "We Didn't Start the Fire" about 2000-2004 with Maurissa in history today. Oh that sucked. She insisted we put "Bennifer" as a major event of the past four years. Bennifer? At first I didn't even know what the fuck she was talking about. Comment from Sarah: What the hell is bennifer? My comment response: It's the whole Ben Affleck-Jennifer Lopez thing. And she spells it "Benniffer". COME ON.
May 18, 2004: [after renting all of Alias with my mom] Exam week was not a good week for Alias.
May 30, 2004: [from a survey] Anime: Freaks me out. Affirmative action: God, I thought this was the death penalty for waaaay too long.
June 28, 2004: I just stood in front of my microwave for five minutes trying to figure out how to heat up my muffin.
July 8, 2004: [from a survey] hidden talents?: Uh. I can detect flat Diet Coke by looking at it from afar. Favorite television show(s)?: The Daily Show and My So-Called Life you ideal bf/gf: Jude Laaaaaw. When's the last time you cried?: Yesterday. Over Freddie Mercury.
July 14, 2004: I flirted for about 15 seconds with a guy who ended up being fourteen. Man, when guys hit puberty, age gets so damn ambiguous.
July 17, 2004: At some points I found Harold [of Harold and Maude] incredibly attractive, and other times really creepy. Comment from Camille: I've been compared to Harold in one of those online test. My comment response: Makes sense, since I often find you incredibly attractive, while also being really creepy. Camille's comment response: Oh dude...that is me...IN A NUTSHELL.
July 27, 2004: Under Student Progress Dr. Beier [my Creative Writing teacher from ADVANCE] wrote: "Elizabeth was reluctant to participate in class discussions unless asked but her answers were always intelligent and her writing was elegant and quite ambitious. I feel that in her quiet way she made good use of her experience in class."
August 5, 2004: The sole purpose of this guy's journal is to POST SCARY PICTURES OF HIS WEIRD CIRCUMCISED-OR-SOMETHING-I'M-NOT-TOO-SURE-WHAT'S-WRONG-WITH-IT PENIS AHHHHHH.
August 5, 2004: I just spent an hour in my room with Rufus Wainwright, Franz Ferdinand, and lots of nail polish. [Also, I ended this entry with the following quote: "I am the biggest whore in Western Asia. Or Eastern Europe...there's not really a line there, pretty boy." I have NO IDEA where this is from. Google did not help.]
August 7, 2004: my mom donated blood and it made her really tired. They asked her if she's given someone drugs or money to have sex with her and she couldn't stop giggling.
August 16, 2004: My mom made me watch a lot of men's gymnastics because she's in love with the Hamm twins. She keeps talking about their red hair and how Morgan Hamm told Paul Hamm "You're up, pal".
August 19, 2004: Creative Writing is okay. I felt like an idiot, because she had this paragraph thing and said "Give a parable of this in good writing" and I had NO idea what the fuck parable meant. So I just wrote some bullshit thing about how you should know the meaning of the word 'parable' to be a good writer.
August 24, 2004: Last night I woke up and had a weird panic attack about cockroaches being in my bed. I was moving around really fast and hit my head on the wall. Things got kind of fuzzy after that.
August 25, 2004: I was on my way back to Kansas' room and I accidently walked into Dr. Hightower's. Everyone just stopped talking and looked at me and I just slowly backed out of the room. That was pretty embarassing. [GOD I remember this. It really mortified me.]

That was a lot, sorry. And I'm probably the only one who finds this the least bit amusing or interesting in any way. But reading all of this stuff is like TIME TRAVELING.

High School Livejournal.

I have rediscovered the LiveJournal I kept in highschool, from summer 2002 to spring 2006. It's kind of amazing, in a very strange way. Some favorite insights so far:

Dec 10 2002: There's a French sophmore at Franklin who's name is Guillome. I've decided that's probably the coolest name ever.
Jan 20 2003: We got DSL and it takes like two minutes to download a song now.
Jan 25 2003: Is ABBA Swedish?
Jan 25 2003: I still haven't really figured out if I left my No Doubt tape in London.
March 9 2003: I don't even know if I'm for or against this thing with Iraq. More worried with passing math, really. Nuclear war is a scary thought, but so is being a freshman twice.
March 10 2003:
Things That Suck:
Life (occasionally)
School
Math
McNabb [my geography teacher]
Term papers on damn cities no one gives a rat's ass about
People who make fun of people
Food
Hypocrites
Hangnails
Ulcers
Ms. Lew [my algebra teacher]
Christina Aguilera
Fatness
Fuckin liars who tell me I'm not fat
Pop-up windows
Spending four years of your life liking someone who doesn't look at you
My stomach
Regular coke
When *69 doesn't work
Drugs
The name Eunice
Bloodshot eyes
The Backstreet Boys
When someone ignores you
Mass murders
Li Po
A shitload of other stuff
March 20 2003: So, apparently we're at war. That sucks. I got into geography fifth period and CNN was on with Baghdad on fire and I felt really bad that we bombed them, but oh well it wasn't my decision.
May 3 2003: Anyway, I guess I should attempt at my goddamn project. Sudan can go to fucking hell. [I had a big geography project to do on Sudan]
May 14 2003: When I was walking home this afternoon I found a rosary on the ground and I picked it up and took it home in case it's a sign from God. If it is, I don't know what the sign means, which makes me hope it isn't because if God is trying to give me a sign, I don't want to be the person who goes down in history as the Girl Who Ignored God.
May 29 2003: I just remembered...in exactly seven months I'll be sixteen!
July 27 2003: I LOVE The Flaming Lips and I LOVELOVELOVE The Big Lebowski!!
July 30 2003:

[

music

|

Sigur Ros - Track I

]

I talked to this guy who's friends with my Pentacostal cousin and he freaked out because I've never heard of Stained. Who the fuck is Stained? He hasn't heard of Radiohead, so fuck him.
August 2 2003: I'm going to send Ross Hull (of Are You Afraid of the Dark? fame) a birthday card. I had such a crush on him when I was like five.
August 7 2003: I'm liking this band Sigur Ros in a big ole way. Yep. Shit's gone down down to Chinatown with Daniel/Mike. Fuck them. I love this Radiohead album to death. I like Sigur Ros.



This is all pretty great. It's fun to hear my old self, especially at age 15. I just wish I could go back in time and tell my old self not to worry about 95% of the shit I worried about.
I am so glad I am not a teenager anymore.

FUCK.

FUCK MY LIFE.



FUCK.

O.K. I don’t want to be a total buzzkill.

BUT.

I was looking at old pictures on Life’s website from World War II. When I saw this thumbnail, I thought it would be an American soldier holding up drawings he found from prisoners. But no. This is the caption:

Buchenwald Concentration Camp
Amer. soldier holding tanned pieces of tattooed human skin taken fr. the bodies of prisoners chosen to be killed by the inspector wife of the Nazi camp director, because she liked their tattoos & wanted to use them to make purses & lampshades.

Alright. Going to go throw up/kill myself now. Oh, Holocaust, you never fail to shock me! (but seriously I'm going to be haunted for about ever now)

God Mobile

Every year in Tuscola (where we moved after Katrina and where I graduated high school and where my mom still lives) this booth is set up in the park during Fourth of July, a big deal in Tuscola.

I failed the test.

What takes up my iTunes?

Right now, my iTunes library looks like this:

• 10,540 tracks
• 28.8 days of music
• 51.25 GB of music

These are the artists I have the most of. It's a good list:
1. The Beatles (207 songs)
2. Radiohead (157 songs)
3. Animal Collective (139 songs)
4. Paul Simon (118 songs)
5. Bright Eyes (80 songs)
6. Death Cab for Cutie (74 songs)
7. Panda Bear (70 songs)
8. Cat Power (68 songs)
9. Sigur Ros (62 songs)
10. The White Stripes (58 songs)

Celebrity deaths I've cried over

1. 1997 - Princess Diana (I was 9)
2. 2001 - George Harrison (I was one week shy of 14)
3. 2003 - Elliott Smith (I was 15)
4. 2008 - Heath Ledger (I was 20) (cried hardest)
5. 2008 - David Foster Wallace (still 20)

This is what happens

When I put iTunes on shuffle:

I.
1. The Beatles - Doctor Robert
2. KC & The Sunshine Band - That's The Way I Like It
3. The Beatles - Love You To
4. Girl Talk - Shut The Club Down
5. Radiohead - The Gloaming
6. Feist - Mushaboom
7. Eagles of Death Metal - Speaking in Tongues
8. Cat Power - Water & Air
9. M83 - Highway of Endless Dreams
10. The Notwist - Boneless

II.
1. Sigur Ros - Untitled 1
2. Spaceman 3 - Lord Can You Hear Me?
3. Alex Gopher - The Child
4. 311 - Don't Stay Home
5. Elton John - Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word
6. The Beach Boys - California Girls
7. Kiss - Shout It Out Loud
8. The Big Pink - Dominos
9. Rilo Kiley - Go Ahead
10. Fever Ray -Seven

III.
1. Tom Waits - Ol' 55
2. Kate Bush - Aerial
3. The xx - Basic Space
4. Sam Cooke - You Send Me
5. Third Eye Blind - Blinded
6. Jackson Browne - Running on Empty
7. Deerhoof - +81
8. Bat for Lashes - Sleep Alone
9. Panda Bear - Winter in St. Moritz
10. Wavves - Cool Jumper